realize...

I realized something today.

I realized that I don't want to go back to my hometown, if I do, it's just for visiting.

I don't ever want to live there again.

I hate it.

I hate the monotony, I hate everything about it.

Right now I feel as if I don't even want to go back to visit my family, but I know that I have to.

I'm so unhappy when I'm home because I feel as if I can't do the things I want to, but at school I can do what I want.

I like having the freedom to do what I want.

This is why I need to get a job; so I can have a reason to come back here during the summer months.

Also for money.