confusion...

I am so confused; I don't know what I want.
Here's my dilemma.

I have a boyfriend, and we've been together for about a year, but I don't know if I want to continue to be in a relationship with him. I feel like that my sister and brother have more fun with him, or he prefers to be with them over me. Which, most of the time, is ok with me. He says that he wants to be with me forever, but I don't know what I want. To be honest, I can't see myself being with him forever.

Don't get me wrong, he's a great guy, it's just that I'm kinda leaning towards being only his friend and not his girlfriend. I don't want to hurt him, either. But I want to be happy, and I don't know how happy I will be with him. Sometimes I really enjoy being around him, but other times, I don't.

My life is so fucked up.
I guess this is just a part of growing up. If it is, I don't want to grow up. Ever.